zeppelin: (Default)
Mina: Well, I am the Patron Saint of Popemobiles
me: how are you the patron saint of popemobiles
Mina: How is anyone the patron saint of anything?
zeppelin: (Default)
A month and a half ago, I married Mina off to Richard III with the dastardly help of Rowan.

Mina: Right now I am far too preoccupied with politics and divorce papers to worry about that sort of thing
me: Divorce papers?
Mina: :)
me: .........You know for someone who is allegedly into having a lord and master, you sure toss them around with a surprising amount of ease

I guess...You know what, I'm not going to finish that sentence. I have yet to fulfill my "get smashed a few hours before leaving Korea" tradition.

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Me: Why does Oliver Goldsmith talk?!
Mina: Because he can't stop.

S: You realize that nunneries are not actually the devil's whorehouses, don't you?
Mina: I know that, that was why I was going to become a Catholic.

Mina: You know what you make me sound like?! A lunatic!
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me, on Drew's facebook: First the truck now the phone Kate is hijacking everything!

friend: Good! Thats how relationships should be. The women drugs the man and takes all of his belongings. Then he chases her down the streets of paris with a handgun and- oh wait I'm describing the plot of an action movie. Never mind.
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Professor [whispering]: You're in the wrong class. There weren't any samurai in late imperial China.

Professor: These readings are fun. But you might just conclude that I have a very sick idea of what constitutes fun.

Professor: It is not a time machine or magic bus or magic treehouse. I am not Miss Frizzle. Even though I sometimes feel like Miss Frizzle. When it's raining.
zeppelin: (oh no!)
Drew: Cat puked.
me: on what?
Drew: The dog.


Jun. 4th, 2010 07:43 pm
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Christine: I hate animals! I will kill a pet. I'll say it's an accident.
Ean: Naw, I'll put 'to the kids from mommy' on the collar, and the kids will say 'oh thank you mommy' and your heart will grow three sizes that day.
Christine: If you buy our spawn a pet, I am going to give you divorce papers.
Ean: I know what I'll do, I'll give them the dog while you're deployed. You won't have a choice!
Christine: I will kill it.


May. 15th, 2010 05:21 am
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Arthur: I am not a robot
I can harm humans or, through inaction, allow them to come to harm
I can also ignore humans
and listen to them when they tell me to hurt other humans
and I can allow myself to come to harm
This opens many possibilities
me: being a robot is indeed limiting
Arthur: yes
but not as limiting as being Shia
or a rock
me: oh snap
Arthur: rock is probably the worst
then you're at the mercy of the local Shias
who would insist on throwing you at things'
me: but human flesh is fairly yielding
Arthur: That doesn't mean I want to go mashing myself against other human flesh all the time
well, I mean
if I were a rock
I probably wouldn't like that
Other things I am not:
-The messiah
-A load-bearing structure
-A pronoun
-A bale of cotton being used by the CSA to blackmail Great Britain
me: oooh
I know
a bag of stale cheetos!
Arthur: I am...
also not that
Arthur: I am also not Mother Teresa
nor am I a pogo stick.
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Mina: Son.
Mina: Am I the only sane person you know?! :P
me: i wouldn't say that...
zeppelin: (Default)
Gwaihiril [to Person]: You are not allowed to die by suffocation.
Me: But burning is okay!
Gwaihiril: Or by anything else! And you [turning to me] are not allowed to burn anyone at the stake!
Person: I actually prefer suffocation to being burned alive.
Gwaihiril: But fire.
Person: I agree that fire is awesome, but being on fire...
[science science blah blah]
Gwaihiril: ...But wait, if you became fire, wouldn't you become awesome?
Person: Well...
Gwaihiril: HAHA I win.


zeppelin: (Default)

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