zeppelin: (Default)
Drew: I'm wanting to stay at the apartment, but I choose not to out of fear of Ani coming home in disgrace and surprising me whilst Naked.

There are many wins to this comment, but I'm thinking the capitalization of naked takes the cake.

uh oh

May. 14th, 2010 04:34 am
zeppelin: (Default)
Ani has taken to listening to "He Had it Coming" from Chicago on repeat as she cleans and cleans and cleans her room. Keep this in mind if someone finds my bloody, sawed up corpse in the rafters.
zeppelin: (Default)
"So I was running copies for Sergeant Thompson, and I was looking for paper in the copy supplies room. Then the Colonel came in and said, 'Christine, go get paper from supply. Why would you get paper in here?' So I went to supply and I came back up, and the Colonel's still there, and he says, 'Christine, I tell you to get paper and you don't even know where to go.' So he leaves and I'm running copies and then Master Sergeant comes in and says, 'Here, I'll make it so it staples them, too!' But the copier's not that high tech, right? So it freaks out and starts spitting out blank pages. Then the Colonel comes back in and starts going off on how expensive paper is and how many trees are dying. So I hit cancel and redo it. And while I'm running the copies, Master Sergeant just starts taking pens out of my uniform and says, 'These are cheap-ass pens. Why don't you get some nice pens to put in your uniform?' and then he takes out a pen with the [other battalion's] logo on it and says 'This is another battalion's pen! Why do you have another battalion's pen?' and the Colonel just looks at me like I killed his kitten or something. Hello, it's a pen! So I tell him that it's just a pen, I use it because it's a free pen and I'm poor. The Colonel says, 'You're not poor. None of you have any idea what it's like to be poor.' Then I'm finally stapling the things for Sergeant Thompson, and Master Sergeant's there too, and he just beats the shit out of the stapler, and it breaks. Then the Colonel comes up and asks what's wrong with the stapler, and says, 'Cadet, what did you do to the stapler,' and Master Sergeant is just like 'Uhhh, it's defective. De-fec-tive.' I HATE THIS BATTALION."


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